It’s easy to fall to playing the victim when your life takes a plunge for worse. Being the victim feels bad and we think we don’t want to feel this way. But as crazy and incomprehensible as it may sound we get false rewards from doing so, even if we don’t consciously realise it. What rewards you ask? How could playing the victim possibly make me feel good in anyway? Well, being the victim deflects any responsibility, any fault in the situation away from you, it’s easy and comfortable to not doing anything to change your situation – you don’t have to go out of your comfort zone, you don’t have to be vulnerable again, and so you protect yourself from getting hurt; to name a few.
These things do not help you to grow and do not make your situation any better. Playing the victim is addictive and no good for you. So do yourself a favour and stop playing the victim.
Accept the situation for what is, allow yourself to feel the emotions you feel – be compassionate to yourself, don’t berate yourself for feeling a certain way (even if you feel the victim – don’t feel bad for feeling the victim). Awareness and observation are the first step. Then, decide to take control of your thoughts which will dictate how you feel. Decide to stop playing the victim, blaming other people, decide to believe in empowering beliefs that serve you and let go the negative ones that do not. Accept, acknowledge and even give thanks to the negative, disempowering beliefs that serve to protect you in some way and then let them go.
When you do this miraculously the once persistent thoughts fade away and the mind is able to shift to more empowering, positive, loving thoughts. It’s a funny thing that when your thoughts change – or when you force them to change I should say, the experiences that you attract into your life change. Think unhappy, bitter and angry thoughts and surely bad things are attracted to you. Think kind, positive and empowering thoughts and you will attract those experiences which reflect those thoughts and make you feel more positive, empowered and happy. What you think you become and you attract what you are.
Of course saying all of this is easy but difficult to actually do. To change you really must put in the work, day in, day out. At first it will seem a chore, unnatural and forced, but it will become easier and more natural over time. Only when you change does your life change.
You can be the victim of your life, or equally you can be the protagonist. The choice is yours. You are the only one solely responsible for the thoughts you think and the feelings you feel. Don’t be disillusioned thinking that someone else is responsible for making you think or feel a certain way. It is only your interpretation of these external things that will determine what you think and how you feel. Be careful about what you focus your attention on.
Decide, are you going to let pain make you bitter or better? Are you going to give up or get up when life hits you hard?
If you want to live a great life, you can. Make the choice to stop playing victim. Be the protagonist. Be the hero of your life.
All content belongs to the author and is subject to copyright.